Small Stones

Being present in one's own life is tricky business.  It is easy to get distracted by shiny baubles like daydreams about the trip to Tahiti that is so far out of the budget it inhabits a different planet.  Who can resist providing advice and commentary on another person's life?  We don't need to know them.  We can pontificate about how Angelia Jolie should put on some weight or which woman the Bachelor should pick as a wife.  We are experts on about  everything but our own lives.

It is frightening to be aware of ourselves, of what is happening in us and around us.  In the Power of Now  Eckhart Tolle talks about being present.  Historically, I have not been particularly skilled in this area.  A friend of mine used to call me a flight risk.  Several years ago the two of us decided to conduct an experiment.  We both had to attend a weekend long business meeting.  We agreed that instead of our usual daydreaming and doodling we would try to be present.  It was struggle!  After about an hour I was ready to throw in the towel.  I did not feel better. I felt worse. To describe my mood at that point as cranky is being generous and kind.  I was ready to start a revolt to overthrow the president and fire the planning committee.  Needless to say, this attitude was not helpful to the task at hand.  To be fair, my friend was in no better shape.  But we persevered.  We paid attention and tapped our feet.  We listened to the reports and rolled our eyes.  Then at the end of the day we allowed ourselves one hour to vent.  The next day we started again. The good news is that no blood was shed, no one was ousted from their job and we began the practice of paying attention.

It has gotten easier over the last few years.  There are relapses.  Committee meetings still test the my resolve and skill, but for the most part I have learned to be present to my life.  It is an ongoing process.


Being present isn't always easy.  It means I have to be present to the pain as well as the joy.  When a crying child is comforted they settle more quickly than when left alone.  The pain dissipates more quickly when attended to with compassion and attention.  It is counter intuitive, but for me it is true.

Much to my delight I discovered a site recently which combines the practice of being present with a writing challenge.  Kaspar and Fiona, who are the hosts of Writing Our Way Home, have developed the idea of small stones.  Small stones are short pieces of focused writing which capture a moment.  To write a small stone you have to keep your eyes open and be aware,  otherwise the stone might pass you by.  The challenge has been issued to write a small stone a day for the month of January.  I have accepted the challenge.  It helps me pay attention and gives me another focus for writing.

I have added another page to the blog devoted to the small stones.  If you click on it you will find a link to Kaspar and Fiona's site with instructions for writing and posting small stones.  You will also find my small stones.  Feel free to join in!


May your journey of being present in your life be graced with joy!